All parents have heard about the delights of adolescence. Many people wait in horror for the X hour, when the child begins to behave in a way that is not childish. How can you understand that this time has come, and survive a difficult period without drama?
Typically, behavioral changes begin between the ages of 9 and 13, says Carl Pickhardt, a psychologist and author of The Future of Your Only Child and Stop Yelling. But if you still doubt, here is a list of indicators that the child has grown to a transitional age.
If a son or daughter does at least half of what is listed, congratulations — a teenager has appeared in your house. But don’t panic! Just accept that childhood is over and a new interesting stage in the life of the family has begun.
Adolescence is the most difficult period for parents. You need to set boundaries for the child, but not lose emotional closeness with him. This is not always possible.
But there is no need to try to keep the child near you, remembering the old days, and criticizing every change that has happened to him. Accept that the calm period when you were the child’s best friend and helper is over. And let the son or daughter distance themselves and develop.
Parents of a teenager witness an amazing transformation: a boy becomes a boy, and a girl becomes a girl
Transitional age is always stressful for parents. Even if they are aware of the inevitability of change, it is not easy to come to terms with the fact that instead of a small child, an independent teenager appears, who often goes against parental authority and violates established rules in order to win more freedom for himself.
This is the most thankless time. Parents are forced to defend family values and protect the interests of the child, conflicting with his personal interests, which often run counter to what adults consider right. They have to set boundaries for a person who does not want to know boundaries and perceives any actions of parents with hostility, provoking conflicts.
You can come to terms with the new reality if you perceive this age in the same way as childhood — as a special, wonderful period. The parents of a teenager witness an amazing transformation: a boy becomes a boy, and a girl becomes a girl.